As I was saying, the sensei in Kokoro had a past, a dark one that he would not tell anyone, not even his wife. Perhaps it is this secret that compels me to read the whole book, or rather how the student himself is so intrigued by it. At one point of time, I thought that the book shall not contain the sensei's past and if that is so, I shall be greatly disappointed and forever pondering what it may be. As it turns out, the sensei presented his story clearly in the third chapter. Maybe extra, but all the same, necessary to me.

The sensei's past is not unlike what some people may have suffered in life. Many may be able to identify with him. Not me, though. But it shears my heart at how one person's past can form his future so much that it destroys the entire being. I read and I revere the sentiment felt which is quite unexplained in the first two chapters when the general died after the Meiji Emperor's death. It did not cross my mind then that patriotism can catch such a strong hold onto one person to allow himself to end his life along with what he probably assumed as the end of an era. That it could affect so many other citizens as well, even the student's father, and needless to say, the sensei as well.

"Soft sunlight." This phrase captures my heart in one page in Kokoro, and it took me a while to flip through the many pages again to search out this phrase because I have forgotten what it was. There are certain phrases that I like, at how the different authors would describe or say of certain things. Just like how Kundera once said of the air as 'crispy'.

Then I allow myself to read Frances Hodgson Burnett's The Secret Garden even when FK lent me The Little Princess first. The latter one will just have to wait a bit. There's an excerpt from this book that I like:

Much more surprising things can happen to any one who, when a disagreeable or discouraged thought comes into his mind, just has the sense to remember in time and push it out by putting in an agreeable determinedly courageous one. Two things cannot be in one place.

"Where you tend a rose, my lad,
A thistle cannot grow."

It is a book for children and adults alike, so the language is easily digestible and the story a thrill to behold. I watched the movie Secret Garden when I was young, but I knew that was not how the story ended, as it was not also for the movie Little Women that I watched. It is refreshing to read a children's book once in a while; it takes the load off. And I like to hear how Colin talks about the Magic, and how Mrs Sowerby says that He is known by many other names. How comforting!

Then I started on Banana Yoshimoto's Lizard, which turns out to be a collection of short stories. I used to think that short stories are bad, and I never take much liking to them. I'd rather read a novel, something lengthy and more solid. Short stories tend to be left hanging in the end, and that was how I initially felt about her works. However I persevered, and I was shown the light when I read what she wrote about the book. Lizard is a collection of short stories, related somewhat, with the same theme that carries hope in the lives of other people in different walks of life. This is a new revelation to me, and I have come to appreciate short stories better; it reminds me of a series of artwork based on one theme.

At where I am now, I can barely exceed the 2500 word limit. So perhaps I should consider writing short stories first, and make a collection of it, with the same theme.

It being in my possession, still I hesitate not a moment to read Coelho's By the River of Piedra, I sat down and wept. Coelho seems to be at his height in expounding about Catholicism, with a tinge of deviant towards Mother Mary that reminds me of Dan Brown's novel. Excusing all that, I follow the story well, and simply like the way Coelho talks about love. The way it concluded is out of my expectation, as I thought it would be a sad story. It turns out that the man could love and be with the woman as well as continue on with his faith. I'm glad such decision can come about, but it does not work for everyone.

posted by lil piggie at 2:01 AM